...You Shall Receive

By the end of this email, you will understand the meaning of my title.

Our appointment this last Tuesday couldn't have gone any better. Cody was able to come with me this time which always makes it easier to handle. You go prepared to hear anything but hoping that things are getting better. And things are indeed getting better! My cervix actually thickened a lot! Which, we were told when we were in the hospital before Thanksgiving, doesn't happen. So the first measurement without pressure was in the mid 30's mm. Then with pressure (to mimic a contraction) it went down to 25mm and funnels alittle. And you could see that it is curving instead of staying straight. During our 1st appointment with the specialist, my cervix was straight as an arrow. It naturally should be curved. The theory is that a straight cervix can hold less pressure and has the potential to open up easier. I wish all this means that I can resume some normal activities but I'm still to be on bedrest and conitnue my meds. I see my regular OB on Monday and will get another ultrasound to check on everything. And then see the specialist the following week. I am so happy and am actually feeling hopeful that I can carry this baby close to term. Plus, this Saturday I am 24 weeks. As a NICU nurse, my milestones are way different then someone who's not. I don't count trimesters or months. To tell you the truth, I don't even know when the months switch over. All I count are weeks. And at 24, the baby is considered viable. Then I will be waiting for 27 weeks. Cause the chance of survival increases and so on and so on. I know that the only reason this is happening is because I have so many people praying for me. Family, friends, and whole churches of people I don't know. I am so grateful and humbled that God is answering our prayers.

These last few weeks were very emotional and stressful. I shut down and didn't want to talk to anyone. Not only because of the pregnancy but we are also having to deal with the financial aspect of me not working. I am the main bread winner in the house (even though Cody works alot harder then me). I do have disability but that won't kick in till January. I didn't have much vacation and sick time saved so we were looking at a bleak Christmas. We also tried to cut back on everything from the phone to cable. We are even looking at giving up one of the cars. But without even asking, people have opened their hearts and their wallets. People at my work are donating some of their vacation time to me and calling and offering to bring meals. One of my family members usually adopts a family for Christmas. Well this year, they adopted us and we have been receiving goodies on our door step for the last 3 days. And "Santa" had ALOT of help from mine and Cody's parents and my sister this year. The boys will now have presents to open under the tree on Christmas morning. I don't think there's anything that breaks your heart more as a parent then not knowing if you will be able to afford gifts for your kids during Christmas. Not even cheapy Walmart gifts. We are the kind of people that usually help others. Offering the meals and donating things during the holiday season. So when the tables are turned, it is very hard at first to accept the help. You feel guilty and unworthy. But then you realize that God is answering your cry for help. When you ask him to pull you out of a dark hole, he may not send help in the form of a huge check. He may disguise the help as family and friends offering themselves and what they have to you. You just have to be humble enough to accept it and say thank you. So, you see, if you ask, you shall receive. In more ways then you could have ever imagined!